It's 5 kilometers, not 5000 miles, Michael.

Ok Judgy McJudgerson--you've never wet your pants before? Suuuuuure.

Let's start at the beginning, shall we?

Last Saturday I ran a 5K. Luckily I watched The Office beforehand, so I knew not to train by running cross country.

My goal was to do it in less than 30 minutes, and I ran it in 28:28, so I'm feeling pretty good about that. If you're really into me and want to check me out, the race results are online here. I came in 156th. So there you go.

You know what is fascinating to me about races? The disparity in times. For example, the winner of the 5K ran it in 18 minutes and 18 seconds. And the very last person for the 5K did it in 1 hour and 4 minutes. That's a 20 minute mile. So the person who won ran 3 miles faster than that person walked 1. Similarly, the person who won the half marathon did it in 1 hour and 6 minutes (HOLY CRAP). Which is only 2 minutes longer than the 5K walker. Anyway, it's just interesting to me.

Oh, I still haven't splained myself!

OK. So you know how in the morning you usually have to go to the bathroom more than you do later in the day? Well, that morning, I got up, went to the bathroom, got ready for the race, and went to the race.




Oh, look, there I am at the beginning!

So I sort of had to use the bathroom at this point, but there was nowhere to go. So I was like, whatever Erin, you can hold it for half an hour. No big deal. So the whole race I kept thinking about it, of course, and thinking, you can do it, you can wait.

I've heard of people just going for it while they run, and I always thought that was incredibly repugnant. I thought about it, and was like, no. I am a civilized human being. I can wait.

My mom came and met me when I had like half a mile left and ran with me. We were running along, about 200 yards from the finish, seriously, when it just happened. It just came, like my bladder had a mind of its own. I said, "Hey mom, I told myself I wouldn't, and I'm not trying to, but I am totally wetting my pants right now." And she laughed and said, "Come on, you're almost to the end! Every girl you pass pushes you further up in the rankings!"

So I ran to the end. The most surprising part? No leg chafing. I thought for sure I would be all itchy and such. Too much? Sorry.

Luckily I had a long sleeved shirt that I'd tied around my waist during the race. My mom turned it around to cover the front of me, apparently the back of me was dry. Perfecto patronum.



And here I am, right at the finish. Good thing this pic is only from the waist up . . . . .




Chris was there, duh. And totally grossed out. He made me sit on a blanket in the car on the way home. Also he was really cute and yelled at me as I ran by and waved at me.

Me and mama. She met a friend who was doing the marathon at the mouth of the canyon, ran to the mall, then ran the 5K course backwards to find me. That's just the sort of mom she is.

Don't make fun of me. It just happened.